Pultizer Prize-winning American columnist Jimmy Breslin wrote a front page feature story on Melanie Cane the author of Poisoned Love. Click on the icon to read Jimmy Breslin's cover story:
Reviews
Melanie Cane was recently featured in The New York Post. Click here to read the full article online.
"Love is a good thing, but too much of a good thing can be toxic. "Poisoned Love" is the reflections of Melanie Caine as she comes to realization of the mistakes she made as her love made her mentally ill and made her commit a crime that she now seriously regrets years later. Poignant and frank about her shortcomings as a person, she reveals that love may not always be the best motivation to do things in one's life. "Poisoned Love" is intriguing reading on the dark side of deep affection."
- Midwest Book Review
I literally could not put this book down. Melanie Cane really gave us insight into her psychiatric illness and what it was like to grow up with a parent who also suffered from a mental illness. She is so honest about her feelings and really appears to leave out no details about her relationship with her boyfriend, "Luke," or her parents and doctors. I felt almost like a voyeur looking into her life, but she let us in, so I kept reading! Very well written. A definite page turner.
- Amazon Reader, Hilary P.
"This book is worth reading twice. At the beginning, it clips along in terse, almost adjective free prose. The subject right off the bat, is highly emotional, but the reader feels somewhat disengaged. Everything is told, in a dispassionate voice, not unlike that which would belong to a third party observer. The writer, a doctor on the road to becoming a psychiatrist, recounts how the death of her demanding, illogical, anger-prone mentally ill father, sets the stage for her own dependency upon a lover, who reflects some of the same patterns of engagement and rejection as her father did. When the lover breaks up with her, she poisons him, with the intent of making him sick enough to know he needs her. So many people can identify with the need to be needed, the desire to be special in someone's eyes, the hunger to be essential in at least one person's life, and many like, the arsonist, who really wants to be the hero putting out the flames, cross barriers they shouldn't cross. Doing that, we berate ourselves, for our stupidity and lack of insight and perhaps we go see a psychiatrist to protect ourselves from doing it again. What is challenging and liberating in reading this book, is that Melanie is intelligent and knows all about psychiatry and admittedly still succumbs to an uncontrollable emotional urge to do what ever she can to get out from underneath uncomfortable feelings. We can't read this book and walk away and say, it's a matter of being 'smart enough' to see through ourselves and through the games people play with us. Intelligence will not save us, especially when we have been bounced hard in someone's 'come here/go away' cycle. Melanie faced incarceration in both a psychiatric ward and jail. She faced judgments in court, by tribunals of her peers and in the press. Worst of all, her inner judge often spoke with the voice of the father who could never be pleased. The author's writing warms up, as she discusses her feelings over her diagnosis, her developing relationships with therapists,her faithful and supportive mother and others, her emerging sense of self worth and a realization of the value of her sufferings. These chapters, should be required reading for all students and practitioners in the fields of mental health. The book is an excellent gift for those who have friends or family suffering mental or emotional illness. It offers light, hope and understanding, all based on incredible honesty. On page 320, the author says, "I wanted people to know they could lose everything and still be okay." In writing this book, the author has not only succeeded in doing that, she has made herself the therapist, nonpareil. She stands emotionally naked, her vulnerabilities totally exposed, her life and mind bare to the world. In doing so, she puts a warm embracing arm around those who are afraid of the winds that rock and thrash the unstable corners of heart and mind. As I said at the beginning, this book should be read twice, if not more times. On second reading, the terse, almost feelingless prose makes sense, as the writing of one who, is mature enough not to be totally engaged in their own reactions, as one who sees and no longer judges harshly. Read it. Learn from it. Share it and read it again."
- Barnes and Noble customer, val4nier
"Posioned Love, by Melanie Cane, is probably one of the best books I have ever read. It took me almost 2 full days to complete it, but I could not put it down. When reading the book you feel as if Melanie is sitting in your living room talking with you about her life. If you ever have known anyone who you think has a " mental problem " then I suggest you read this outstanding book. To me it confirmed the line that says " everyone you meet is having some sort of personal struggle on the inside".If her goal was to educate the public about mental illness then she scored a perfect one hundred!!!"
- Barbara Proctor- Pleasanton, CA
"POISONED LOVE tells the true story of Melanie Cane, M.D. Her story is that of a wonderfully intelligent and successful woman, but also the story of a woman with a severely troubled past and psychological issues. In this way, it reminded me of Elyn Sak's memoir, THE CENTER CANNOT HOLD. However, more than THE CENTER CANNOT HOLD, the story of Cane makes one think. How forgiving should society be? On one hand, one can easily see the stigma of mental illness, but should society really go so far as handing drugs back to a person who has previously abused her position?
Cane poisoned her live-in boyfriend, Luke. After that event, she is involuntarily committed to a hospital, has her medical license revoked, and serves a very brief prison sentence.
If POISONED LOVE were just about these details, then the book would too similar to "rubbernecking" to see an accident on the highway to ever intrigue me; however, Cane makes POISONED LOVE something much more than that. Instead, the book is a very personal look into the most difficult aspects of her life. Throughout the book, Cane describes her thoughts as they were at the time the events happened. This perspective gives a disturbing insight into her "fluid" thoughts between the rational and irrational, leaving the reader with the feeling that anyone can be subject to psychological issues--maybe not with Borderline Personality Disorder, but more in a way that makes the subject so very much more human than the labels usually thought about. When one reads her descriptions of her obsessive love, thought processes, high points, and low points one is brought into her story completely.
The content and human perspective is what makes POISONED LOVE not only great, entertaining, but also informative and helpful.
The story, though, could have used some help with the flow and coherency. Perhaps, though, life itself lacks coherency and thus the memoir has to follow. At the same time, I felt that the beginning could have used something to tie together. It's hard to organize one's entire life as if it were "material", but "foreshadowing" could have helped immensely in several cases. Specifically, the degeneration of her relationship with Luke would have been helped by a little more information about her father (until much of that point we knew more about the "good" events with the father than the negative events) and the ending with Cane's cousin. If he--and his family--were a major inspiration for the story, it would have helped to at least have mentioned him (even if only to say that he was cut off from Cane) a little earlier, otherwise it feels like he was just tossed in haphazardly.
Still, I feel awkward making these complaints, because the book truly was so well done. I believe it's not only an interesting read, but a memoir that can help those struggling with inspiration and those who are not with understanding and thoughtful questions.
Final Score: 3.75/5
As a note, 3.75 out of 5 doesn't sound like a very "good" score to many people, but let me clarify that 3 means a book is average, but entertaining/informative. The redeeming qualities outweigh the detractors above a 3 and once a book gets a 4 it's a book that I wouldn't hesitate recommending to anyone. POISONED LOVE fell closer to a 4 than 3 for me, but I couldn't award a 4 for the reasons of coherency (because coherency truly is one of the most important aspects of a book) above."
- T.J. Hutzol, BOOK LOVE AFFAIR
"I received this book only a few days ago, courtesy of a very nice woman at Bascom Hill Publishing Group. I had known the gist of the story (woman goes crazy, poisons her ex, gets committed, gets better), but I was unprepared for how intimate and tragic the telling of that story was going to be. Suffering from depression myself, I am unfortunately aware of the difficulties of living with a mental illness, but the heartrending pain that Melanie suffered as her rationality crumbled around her is far beyond anything like a run-of-the-mill mental illness. She had everything stacked against her: a severely mentally ill and abusive father, a resentful and angry mother, and an emotionally immature and abusive boyfriend. The rapidity and the extent of her recovery is staggering. She came out of her experience a better and more well-adjusted person than she had been before her breakdown. To those that would judge her (and have judged her), I would ask this: how would you have coped with the immense betrayal, pain, and abuse that Melanie went through? To retreat from reality seemed to be the only thing her mind would allow her to do.
At times, the writing does seem a bit amateurish, and at times the author’s descriptions of her illness and conversations with her doctors struck me as something from a psychiatry textbook…but then again, how else does a medical doctor explain her illness? The flow of the story also seemed stilted to me. Details were left out and referred to later as something that the reader should have known, and memory flashbacks were sometimes inserted into the story at awkward times. But all in all, this book is an engaging read, as Melanie allows her readers a most intimate glimpse into her pain and crumbling sanity. I would recommend this to everyone, as everyone can benefit from getting to know this highly intelligent and courageous woman."
- Sarah Pelandini, Crescent Moon Book Reviews
"Poisoned Love by Melanie Cane is an amazing book. Not just because it is a thrilling and descriptive book about obsession, but because it is the first case study of its kind to explain the healing process. I write about crimes of the heart in my book, so this subject is not new to me. But what about afterwards? How to love addicts get help? What is the healing process? Melanie takes us here. In other words, this book picks up where Fatal Attraction leaves off.
Not only is this a sad tale of love addiction, it is educational for love addicts and anyone who wants to understand love addiction from a first-person perspective. In Poisoned Love the reader is not left wondering how the author could have done these things. The roots of love addiction are spelled out. The author explains why she is a love addict by expounding on her relationship with her father. She goes on to elaborate on the trap that many love addicts fall into—falling in love with a seductive withholder, who, like her father gives mixed signals. Melanie spells this out for us. From the book . . . "I still couldn't understand. If he'd said he didn't love me, perhaps I could have accepted a hopeless situation and walked away. The tremendous inconsistency between his professed feelings [I love you] and his aversion to being with me confused and infuriated me." This is what fueled Melanie's obsession and the anger behind it. This is what caused Melanie to poison her lover. I can't say ex-lover, because he never really went away. He haunted Melanie with professions of love coupled with agonizing neglect. This is what turns a normal love addict (if there is such a term) to one who goes to far.
Here is what is most important about this book. As we follow Melanie into treatment, we learn what is true of most loves addicts, that they suffer from some kind of underlying mental illness. Melanie exposes this and helps the reader understand that to get well, love addicts must go to the root of their problem by treating the underlying disorder. They must also treat other dual and subsidiary addictions like, alcoholism, anorexia, bulimia, overeating, drug addiction, compulsive shopping, gambling, sex addiction, etc. etc. In Melanie's case she had to treat her anorexia and borderline personality disorder—the two most common problems faced by love addicts.
Melanie points out that recovery is an inside job. You must go back to the scene of the crime (your childhood), sort it all out, and then grieve as best you can. Then you must rebuild your life with the aid of this new understanding of why you have done the things you have done. It is as if the love addict must become a caterpillar all over again and experience a new and glorious metamorphosis—this time with sunshine, fewer weeds, an excellent caretaker, and enough water to grow into a beautiful butterfly.
In conclusion, this book is more than an expose of the dangers of loving too much. It is a road map for recovery. Anyone who is fascinated by love addiction will find this book mesmerizing. Anyone who suffers from love addiction will see themselves in Melanie's experience. Some of them will say, "There but for the grace of God go I." Others will say, "I am not alone." All of them will say, "Thank you Melanie for writing this book."
Susan Peabody
Addiction to Love and The Art of Changing
http://brightertomorrow.net
"Poisoned Love" is a beautifully written book that describes a brilliant young physician's descent into psychosis and subsequent recovery — a second chance.
Melanie Cane, the daughter of a mentally ill father, who suffered extreme emotional abuse during her childhood and adolescence, longed for a perfect love. Her irrational attempt to find it led to her terrible mistake, nearly ruining her life. Her long struggle back to sanity and effort to heal herself offers hope for individuals with mental illness who can, with help, attain their full potential and lead productive lives.
Clarice J. Kestenbaum, M.D.
Director of Training Emerita and
Professor of Clinical Psychiatry
Columbia University,
College of Physicians & Surgeons
Adrienne Lopez "Adrienne Lopez, book author, ...
- See all my reviews 
Through "Poisoned Love" Melanie Cane weaves a compelling story that must be told.
The events that take place in this book, could be be happening right outside your door and you wouldn't even know it. The desperation she shares with the reader, could happen in any obsessive relationship, not just a romantic one.
She takes you on a roller coaster ride through desperation, search for love and the consequences through her brilliant use of words.
Other books of this type, that center around this subject can be boring and un-interesting, but Cane is able to make you feel for the character, root for her to win and cheer her on to victory.
Book clubs will love this book, because the discussion points will be lively and I bet most people know someone who may not go this far...but they could!
Enjoy!
Read it and share it!
"POISONED LOVE is a fascinating stew of one person's internal and external dialogue confronting mental illness, unrequited love, loss, childhood wrongs and teh tragedy of one mistake taht can change the entire direction of a life. The book is also a compelling story for anyone who has gone through a difficult time and come out on the other side. Melanie proves that human beings have a tremendous capacity to heal."
Lee Woodruff, Co-Author best selling, IN AN INSTANT
"A truly remarkable book, by an extraordinary person. Her honesty and candor make this book remarkable and the writer extraordinary. Everything is exposed. Nothing is kept secret."
William L. Wood, Jr. WOOD & SCHER, P.C.
"I read a lot of books on addiction and healing (recovery) and I have always managed to find a nugget (and at times many nuggets) of wisdom in each of these books, however, Melanie Cane's story made me so sad and touched me so deeply, that writing this review feels like an extremely personal thing to be doing and I found it extremely difficult to separate the tale told by the author and the fact that I was going to be writing this review. This, to me, is the sign of a gifted storyteller - to make one forget the fact that they are reading a book - with Cane's uncanny ways of detailing her most personal feelings, she actually had me feeling as though we were best friends sitting at the kitchen table as she described her frustration and fears to me."
Tina Avon, FRONT STREET REVIEWS
Click here to read Front Street Review
"Poisoned Love" is one of the most compelling and insightful self-examinations I have ever read of a life in crisis and the potential for transformation. As is true with many books of this kind, it is not a self-indulgent, fluffy, self-help book which is part of the brilliance of it's appeal which I think will resonate with a diverse audience. As a psychotherapist myself, I have read almost every well-meaning book that might inspire people to seek and find their answers. As a woman I could identify with many of the author's feelings of self-judgment, abandonment and the steps needed to heal those experiences. This book makes the reader feel a part of the human drama as though we were actually on the journey with her. I applaud the author's courage and inner work that led to this marvelous achievement !!!!!!
Laura J. Schultz
Marriage and Family Therapist. Columnist for www.empowerment4women.com
"Poisoned Love it is a very important book and should be required graduate school reading. In particular, it is a great jump start for supervision discussions on how to deal with anger/rage in ourselves touched on by patients (countertransference) and how much empathy really works in treatment. This book also brings tremendous optimism and the possibility of true healing with good treatment."
Jacqueline Devora Schiff, Psy.D
Individual and Group Therapy
Licensed Clinical Psychologist
